After Rebirth, the Celebrity Daughter is the Medical Expert!

Chapter 733 - 584: Second Update

"Is our communication really problematic?" Xia Hui became emotional, "She seems to completely not understand what I’m saying. I tell her one thing and she talks about another! Yet she doesn’t think her understanding is flawed, and she says I’m stubborn. Seriously, who’s the stubborn one here?!"

"It might be a generational gap in ideals."

"It’s not just that." Xia Hui’s expression changed to somewhat hurt, "I feel my mother-in-law opposes me just for the sake of opposition; she doesn’t like me."

"Regarding a mother-in-law not liking her daughter-in-law, many don’t," Ning Youguang paused, saying, "I watched a TV host once say that a mother-in-law doesn’t have the obligation to like her daughter-in-law. If she does, it’s the daughter-in-law’s skill, not an obligation of the mother-in-law. After all, she didn’t raise you, you’re not her flesh and blood. I think there’s some truth in what he said. But you shouldn’t doubt yourself either. If the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law works out, great; if not, just play your role and learn to maintain a proper distance. There isn’t anyone in the world who must like anyone else, especially from the mother-in-law’s point of view. Originally, she was the closest person to her son, then the daughter-in-law comes and ’takes’ her son away, and many mothers-in-law can’t cope mentally, hence they don’t like the daughter-in-law. If the daughter-in-law fusses over her precious son, she sees her even more unfavorably. So between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, maintaining distance, mutual respect, and harmonious coexistence is enough; don’t expect her to treat you the same way she treats her son. It’s not possible. Even mother-daughter relationships need appropriate distance, let alone the expectation between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law."

"Then sometimes, her excessive interference really disrupts the normal life of our small family. What should I do then?" Xia Hui asked.

"Make good use of your husband," Ning Youguang said, "Your mother-in-law doesn’t listen to you, but does she listen to your husband?"

"She does quite well."

"Then don’t worry about it," Ning Youguang said, "Only foolish girls confront their mother-in-law head-on; smart girls generally strategize behind their husband’s back, right?"

Foolish girl Xia Hui was so worried she scratched her head.

She’s straightforward, used to saying what’s on her mind, so she always ends up getting angry and feeling disadvantaged.

"How do you strategize behind your husband’s back?"

"On any daily issues with your mother-in-law, don’t bring it up directly. Instead, talk to your husband later about the areas you feel need adjustment. After talking, let your husband talk to his mom," Ning Youguang said, "Since your mother-in-law won’t listen to you, don’t talk to her; find someone she will listen to speak to her."

"I’ll try." Xia Hui felt Ning Youguang’s suggestion was good.

Even though she decided to implement Ning Youguang’s advice, Xia Hui couldn’t help but worry, "What if I still can’t resolve the conflicts between my mother-in-law and me, and she continues to meddle in my child’s affairs?"

Ning Youguang thought about it and felt solving Xia Hui’s problem needed a fundamental approach, "Then you need to approach every home interaction from a unified angle where everyone’s well-being is considered."

"For example?" Xia Hui asked earnestly.

"For example, right now you believe the baby is your child, right? So whenever your mother-in-law arranges inapproriate foods or uses improper parenting methods with your child and you disapprove, emotions arise and lead to conflict with her, right?" Ning Youguang explained in detail to Xia Hui.

"Yes."

"Throughout this process, your disapproval of everything your mother-in-law does stems from it being done to your child, remember, your child," Ning Youguang meticulously unraveled the analysis for Xia Hui, stating, "If your mother-in-law treated someone else’s child the same way, would you find it problematic? Would you be angry?"

Xia Hui froze for a moment, "I wouldn’t be angry, maybe wouldn’t even care."

"The core of the problem lies here," Ning Youguang said, "Any conflict between you and your mother-in-law arises because of the ’my’ in ’my child.’ Because it’s ’my’ child, what she does is wrong, inappropriate, bad. All your judgments about what she does are to protect ’my’ child. If you remove the ’my,’ and your mother-in-law’s way of caring is simply for a child and not your child, one whose parentage you’re unaware of, you would totally not think her actions are problematic. When you no longer see her actions as problematic, all the points of conflict and disagreement between you will disappear, and you can naturally get along harmoniously and find each other agreeable, right? The same logic applies to your approach with your husband."

Xia Hui listened intently, feeling Ning Youguang’s words are both right and somehow not.

"This issue shouldn’t be seen like that. My child is indeed my child, my husband indeed my husband; these are unchangeable facts. As long as my child remains mine and my husband remains mine, my mother-in-law does not change her meddling ways, we can never get along harmoniously."

Ning Youguang understood why Xia Hui didn’t understand her words, so she continued, "Alright, let me tell you, your child is not yours. He came into the world through you to experience life; he’s not yours. If you don’t recognize this, then whenever you face issues related to your child, you will approach them from an ’I’ perspective. Then, your education of your child will only be based on your viewpoint, right?"

"Yes." Xia Hui nodded.

"So, whether it’s the current child-rearing issues or future education challenges, if you choose to think only from your own perspective, your thinking is confined to your angle. But think, if this child isn’t yours, it’s the family’s, how would you proceed? You would view parenting and educating him from a family perspective, right? This way, when discussing the child’s upbringing, you’d consider everyone’s viewpoint in the family, look for an approach that the whole family considers correct, right? Rather than doing things you find suitable and later clashing with family members whose ideas differ."

Ning Youguang noticed Xia Hui’s expression calmed and continued speaking, 1314